The Adventures of the Leconauts Season 11

The Leconauts at Atomhenge, three band night, Loudhailer Electric Company, Jackson D and Hombre at O’Rileys Live Music Venue

The continuing LECo Chronicles

You have landed at the place where you can experience the continuing chronicles of the Loudhailer Electric Company mothership and crew. Starring Leconauts Captain Lou Loudhailer, Sonic Architect Parsons, Ricardo the Astral Bard and Bombardier Walker. Written by Loudhailer Electric Company’s Sonic Architect and keeper of the sacred flangector, this is Season 11 of the adventurous antics of the Leconauts traversing the galaxy and encountering a myriad of marvellous musical lifeforms and dastardly villains as they venture forth to perform at the galaxy’s Temples of Song.

Stardate 070919 The Leconauts at Atomhenge 

THE ADVENTURES OF THE LECONAUTS SEASON 11 EPISODE 1

S11:E1

HERE WE GO WITH ANOTHER SEASON OF THE AWARD-WINNING LECO CHRONICLES! NEW ADVERSARIES, NEW HORIZONS, NEW SPACE AMIGOS!😀

The Leco careened through the outermost reaches of the universe, where vast clouds of multicoloured gases were rushing outwards at dizzying speeds. Alongside them was the Svalbard with Admiral Bunting at the helm. Shaman Hood of the Hawk was on board, enjoying the spectacle. On the Leco’s other flank was the Italian Vogue, commanded by Dino of Jackson D’Ville with his trusty Thunder Conjurer Zachary of The Odourou.

The three starcruisers had set off from Terra Gaia after the Festival of Spacechants at the Withering Sea, where Sir Richard of Harries had so royally entertained them. They were enjoying some well-earned R and R after their combined efforts had saved the universe.

All three ships had set their Vistascreens to Woodstock mode, so that each of their bridges were displayed alongside each other simultaneously.
‘Wow’ said Dino. ‘This is indeed a spectacle to behold! Has any ship ever come so close to the edge of known space?’

‘I would think not!’ said Captain Lou, who had replied because her three crew mates had all swooned at the sound of Dino’s voice.

‘I’ve been here before!’ said Shaman Hood of the Hawk. ‘In the days of the machine logic god Eye-See-Eye I pursued a tribe of Star Cannibals to this point.

‘Did you intercept them?’ asked the Sonic Architect, who had recovered and dusted himself down.

‘No’ replied the Shaman. ‘They used a disappearing incantation – I never saw them again.’

‘Incoming!’ said Conjuror Zachary, suddenly. Each Vistascreen immediately changed to external view and Captain Lou spotted a ship heading towards them at a speed which indicated it must be equipped with a Nova Drive.

‘Identify yourselves!’ ordered Captain Lou. The answer was a blast of unearthly spacetune, in a style with which the Leconauts were unfamiliar.

‘Flangectors on standby’ said Captain Lou. The strange ship drew nearer, coming into visual range. Suddenly everyone gasped. The ship was shaped like a human skull and its eyes were glowing red. The teeth were cycling through the colours of the rainbow in a not unpleasing fashion.

‘Identify yourselves!’ ordered Captain Lou once more. The Vistascreen crackled. A face appeared. On top of the head was a huge wide-brimmed and colourful hat. The face bore a broad grin. It spoke.

‘Hey, muchachos! This is the Starcruiser Sombrero! And we are Hombre!’

Admiral Bunting, who had been watching this exchange from the Svalbard, suddenly did a double-take. He turned to Shaman Hood. ‘What the……?’
The Shaman sat up, on alert. The Admiral began flicking switches and rattling interface sensors. ‘I don’t believe it!’

But, it was true nevertheless. The Leco, the Italian Vogue and the Sombrero had all completely disappeared……….

LECo cartoon poster

 

S11:E2

Captain Lou scowled. Her ship smelled like a pigsty. She picked up one of the sizeable spacerocks she kept close at hand and threw it forcibly towards the Astral Bard’s head. It hit him square on the temple, producing a cry of surprised rage. ‘Git this mess cleaned up!’ she barked. The Astral Bard muttered something under his breath which attracted another well-aimed missile. She turned to her Bombardier and Sonic Architect who were wrestling on the floor. Two spacebots were placing bets on the outcome, using nuggets of aurum as their stakes. She picked up a large pitchfork handle and poked them both hard in the ribs. They parted, cursing, as the spacebots scuttled away.

‘Time for chow! Git to the galley!’ she cried.

The Vistascreen crackled into life. Dino of Jackson D’Ville; ‘Aw, what does he want?!’ she grumbled. Dino leered. ‘Why, I can almost smell y’all from here!’ he said.

‘What do you want, Dino?!’ replied Captain Lou. ‘I’m kinda busy!’

‘I can see that’ replied the sardonic space outlaw. ‘Busy tryin’ to breathe by the look of it!’

‘Quit it!’ said Captain Lou. ‘I ain’t in the mood!’

Dino chuckled. ‘I figured you may want to come on over to the Italian Vogue for a while. I got mah best spacejuice out and I’m gonna whup the crew for insubordination. Figured you may like to watch.’

‘Nah, you git down wit yo’ bad self!’ replied Captain Lou. ‘I’m hittin’ the hay!’

‘Please yo’self!’ said the noxious Neris. The screen went blank.

After a few decahexabits it crackled into life again. ‘Epay epay anderlay! Riba riba!’

‘Oh no’ thought Captain Lou. ‘The Hombres!’

‘Leave me alone you sons of skunks!’ she cried. ‘Hey’ came the reply. ‘No need to be nasty!’ The Hombres all dissolved into hysterical laughter. ‘We’s jus’ being friendly!’ More mirth.

‘Go boil your heads!’ said Captain Lou.

‘Where’s my amigo the Sonic Architect?! Maybe he’s in a better mood?!’

‘He’s in the galley fixin’ tacos’ replied Captain Lou.

‘Mmmm, and guacamole too?! Can we shuttle over and join yo’ party?!’ Cue more hilarity.

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Captain Lou smiled wistfully. Something wasn’t quite right. She looked across to the Astral Bard and said ‘everything is too perfect.’ The Astral Bard smiled back. There was mischief in his eye. ‘Everything is just fine’ he said, reassuringly. ‘You always get jumpy when things are going well!’

‘Do I?’ she replied. Just then she looked around and saw Bombardier Walker and the Sonic Architect working together on spacechant generation. ‘I think it’s time to eat’ she said. ‘Shall we?!’

The Vistascreen crackled into life. Dino of Jackson D’Ville; ‘Good evening, Leconauts’ he said. ‘I’m holding an awards ceremony on the Italian Vogue’ he said. ‘I wondered if you may care to be my honoured guests?’

‘We were just about to eat’ said Captain Lou. ‘Could we make it, say, in a decahexabit?’

‘Sure thing’ replied Dino. ‘See you then.’

The screen went blank and then crackled back into life.

‘Hey, amigos!’ It was Captain Jarnail of the Sombrero.

‘Hey, captain!’ answered Captain Lou. ‘What can I do for you?’

‘Well, we were thinking of having jalapeno fajitas this evening, with refried beans and root beer. We wondered if you might like to shuttle over to the Sombrero?!’

‘I’m sure that would be most agreeable!’ replied the space Amazon. ‘If we hadn’t already accepted an invitation for this evening from Dino of Jackson D’Ville!’

‘We’ll give you a rain check!’ replied the cheery bandido.

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

S11:E3

Hombre poster withstock 1

Admiral Bunting and Shaman Hood of the Hawk were both peering intently at the Vistascreen on the bridge of the Svalbard. Three Sonic Starcruisers had just disappeared without trace in front of their very eyes. Something was profoundly wrong.

The Admiral broke the silence. ‘How can that be? There’s no plasma residue, no ion displacement, no temporal anomaly, no black holes……’

The Shaman didn’t reply. Admiral Bunting looked over to see that the Shaman had closed his eyes and was entering a trance-like state. He knew that there would be no point trying to communicate with his friend for at least a hexabit. He turned back to the Vistascreen. For a split second he thought he saw the screen…shimmer…and the stars all suddenly became blurred as if viewed through a pair of tired eyes. The stars each became two stars…and then the effect was gone as quickly as it had appeared and everything looked normal again. The Admiral rubbed his eyes. He tapped the Vistascreen with his knuckles. No, nothing. ‘Maybe I imagined it’ he thought. But then ‘no, I didn’t imagine it….’

Shaman Hood of the Hawk stood on the Plain of Solsbury. The sun was just about to rise. He saw it cast its rays above the horizon and pierce the ancient stones which surrounded him. His fellow druids began to move in a ritual called the Ghost Dance. The figure in the centre, Shaman Nik, was chanting the primal call to the heavens. Shaman Dave and several others beat out a complex rhythmic signature on ancient thunder machines……

Admiral Bunting dropped his sonic anchor. When Shaman Hood awoke he wanted the Svalbard to be exactly where it was when the three Starcruisers had disappeared. The Vistascreen crackled into life. It was so unexpected that the Admiral jumped. The face of Andy Son of Richard appeared.

‘All hail Admiral Bunting’ said the impossibly tall Terra Gaian. ‘All hail Andy Son of Richard!’ replied the doughty Admiral.

‘We have a Festival of Spacechants to organise’ said Andy. ‘Yes indeed’ replied the Admiral. For now he said no more. How much did he want to reveal? Did he want to tell his friend that he had just witnessed three Starcruisers disappear without leaving so much as an ion emission? He decided on the cautious approach.

‘Who did you have in mind to invite to launch their spacechants into the aether?’ he asked. He had a strange feeling that he knew the answer already.

‘Oh’ began Andy. ‘I thought we should ask the Leconauts, Dino of Jackson D’Ville and Hombre!’

The Admiral’s head suddenly felt twice as heavy. A feeling of panic began to overtake him…..

Shaman Hood of the Hawk was dancing rhythmically in a congregation which also contained his fellow Shamans Nik, Dave and Harvey. The sun had risen and bathed the ancient stone circle in its life-giving light. A sudden sound made them all look skyward. A longship hove into view and came to rest just above their heads. An aperture in its keel opened and a beam of plasma shot downwards. Forms began to swirl within it and then a figure emerged, wearing an ancient flying helmet and goggles. Shaman Hood spoke. ‘Captain Calvert! Welcome……!’

S11:E4

Captain Lou scowled. Her Bombardier was wrestling with Dino of Jackson D’Ville’s Thunder Conjurer, Zachary of The Odorou, and the rest of her crew and the Hombres were placing bets with bags of filthy spacecoin. Spacejuice was being liberally consumed and when a flagon had been emptied it was flung at the head of whichever of the combatants the thrower was betting against.

‘Come on, Bombardier!’ screamed Captain Lou. ‘Finish the lil’ varmint!’

‘I’m tryin’, Cap’n!’ wheezed the clearly exhausted Bombardier. With that Zachary caught him off guard with a well-placed forearm smash and he fell to the ground in a heap. Dino and the Hombres, who had all been betting on Zachary, jumped up and threw their arms in the air, cheering wildly……….

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Captain Lou smiled. She had landed on Betelgeuse, which was owned by Dino of Jackson D’Ville. And he had a Space Station on there too. ‘Excellent’ crooned the suave Neris. ‘That will be three bags of spacecoin, if you please.’

The Astral Bard and Bombardier Walker smiled broadly. They looked slightly dazed.

‘OK, my turn’ said Captain Jarnail of the Sombrero. He shook the cup and a holographic hummingbird emerged, fluttered and alighted on a large red bloom.
‘Oh no!’ he exclaimed. ‘Not Cassiopeia again!’ Captain Lou laughed in delight.

‘Oh yes’ she replied. ‘That will be five bags of spacecoin if you please!’

Captain Jarnail handed over the heavy bags. ‘This is the last time I play Space Monopoly with you, amigo!’ he said.

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Shaman Hood of the Hawk embraced Captain Calvert and led him into the midst of the Shamans gathered within the ancient stone circle.

‘It’s been a long time….’ said the Captain. ‘I presume there’s a good reason why you’ve interrupted my stasis slumber?!’

‘Oh yes’ replied Shaman Hood. ‘There most certainly is…..!’

Admiral Bunting regarded the motionless form of his friend. The Shaman was sitting perfectly still in his Captain’s chair on the bridge of the Svalbard, but, clearly visible beneath his eyelids, his eyes were moving up, down, left and right at high speed…..

Shaman Hood and Captain Calvert were sitting on the grass in the middle of the ancient stone circle on the Plain of Solsbury. The Captain had just imbibed from a large earthenware jug which the Shaman had handed him. His eyes momentarily turned blood red and he whistled through his teeth. ‘Hoowhee!’ he said, and wiped his lips with the back of his hand.

‘So’ continued the Captain. ‘I assume you need me to lead a mission?’

‘I do’ replied the Shaman. ‘We need to launch the Starfighters once more.’

Who do we have in our sights? asked the Captain.

‘Star Cannibals’ came the reply.

‘And where will we find these…creatures?’ asked the Captain.

Shaman Hood smiled. ‘On the edge of time……..’

S11:E5

Captain Lou scowled. The Vistascreen, set to Internal Surveillance mode, showed the Hombres riding on the backs of three spacebots, pell-mell down a corridor in the bowels of the Leco. They were whooping and hollering, flinging their wide brimmed hats into the air and trying hard to knock each other off the diminutive droids.

‘Will yew lookit that?!’ said Dino of Jackson D’Ville. ‘Looks like they’s holdin’ a rodeo in yo’ Starcruiser, cap’n!’

Captain Lou snorted. ‘I’ll give ‘em a rodeo!’ she said. ‘Bombardier – Astral Bard – Sonic Architect!’ she cried. The three Leconauts came running into her presence, looking slightly abashed.

‘All here, cap’n!’ said the Bombardier.

‘Git down onto Level Alpha Bravo and put paid to the fun they Hombres’re havin’ at mah expense!’

‘Right away, cap’n!’ said the Astral Bard. The three Leconauts ran to the Transference Spot and promptly disappeared. Captain Lou and Dino remained where they were, watching the Vistascreen and the Hombres. Then they saw the three Leconauts come into view, each swinging a lasso. As the Hombres rounded the corner the Leconauts lassoed each one, tightened their ropes and brought them off the spacebots which scuttled away. Within seconds the Hombres were hog-tied and complaining vociferously.

Captain Lou pressed the intercom button. ‘Good work’ she said. ‘Now throw ‘em in the hold!’

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Captain Lou smiled. The simulation was going well. Dino of Jackson D’Ville and Captain Jarnail had both agreed that a combat readiness exercise aboard the Leco would be both beneficial and fun. So the crews had been set the tasks of tracking and detaining the spacebots, which had been programmed to act as Galactic Council agents whose mission was to capture the Leco and all aboard her.

The Hombres were acting as decoys and were down in Alpha Bravo sector, apparently working on some equine-o-morphs. Zachary of The Odorou was acting as lookout, and the Leconauts were ready to intercept intruders.

‘Incoming!’ called Zachary via Thought Transference. Dino and Captain Lou, observing from the bridge via the Vistascreen, saw the spacebots scuttling toward the apparently unsuspecting Hombres. Just as the spacebots were about to strike, ceiling panels sprung back and the three Leconauts abseiled down and caught the spacebots with plasma-ties. The Hombres cheered and threw their wide-brimmed hats into the air.

‘Good work’ said Captain Lou over the Thought Transference intercom. ‘Now stow them in the technohold!’

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Admiral Bunting sat on the bridge of the Svalbard. Every few decahexabits he looked over at Shaman Hood of the Hawk, who was still seemingly in a trance, perfectly still apart from his rapidly moving eyes…..

Shaman Hood of the Hawk and Captain Calvert were riding the shaman’s spacehog down the tunnel which led to a secret facility directly under the ancient stone circle on the Plain of Solsbury. The Captain looked around him, taking in the unusual space. ‘It’s a while since I was at Atomhenge’ he said. ‘The place hasn’t changed much!’

‘Almost there’ said the shaman. They rounded a corner and the shaman brought the spacehog to a standstill. They were at the edge of a massive circular space, around the circumference of which giant computers twinkled, tinkled, hummed and thrummed.

But their eyes were immediately drawn to the four ancient flying machines in the centre of the space which stood ready like steel birds of prey.

A droid turned and walked toward them. As it drew close it held out its hand in the archaic Terra Gaian greeting. ‘Welcome Captain Calvert’ it said, before turning to the Shaman. ‘And welcome to you, Shaman Hood!’

Captain Calvert spoke; ‘Good to see you, Lockheed – it’s been a long time……’

Stonehenge LECo

S11:E6

‘Your craft are ready, sir’ said Lockheed, ‘just as they have been these past quitons, awaiting your return.’

‘Much appreciated’ replied Captain Calvert. ‘Shaman Hood and I are going to take two of them for a spin. Care to join us?’

‘It would be an honour, sir’ replied the deferential droid. ‘May I ask of our destination?’

The Captain smiled. ‘The edge of time….’

The Star Cannibal was hungry. Not in any accepted sense of the word which would be understood by any other beings in the universe which it was greedily consuming. It had appetites, which it indulged completely dispassionately. It served no higher purpose other than the continuance of its own existence. And when it came to it, it would consume, or be consumed by, the others of its kind.

A curious effect of the curvature of space-time, so far out at the edges of the universe, was that the Star Cannibal had to conduct its feasting at speeds so fast as to be almost immeasurable, lest it actually consume itself. This risk mattered not a jot to the Star Cannibal. It ate, therefore it was.

Shaman Hood of the Hawk climbed into the cockpit of the Starfighter. He was surprised to see that it had been extensively upgraded since his last flight. The surroundings morphed to his shape and the instruments arranged themselves according to where he thought they should be. He looked across to see that Captain Calvert was doing something similar. He gave the thumbs up sign to indicate all was well.

The third craft containing the droid, Lockheed, drew up alongside and Captain Calvert gave the signal. The three Starfighters rose vertically, pivoted until they were pointing their nosecones directly upwards, and waited. Far above, a patch of light appeared as a huge door rolled open.

‘Geronimo’ cried the Captain, and the three ships shot skywards. Upon the Plain of Solsbury witches, thanes, druids and nymphs looked to the skies as a huge column of plasma erupted into the firmament.

Shaman Hood had thought-configured the controls of his Starfighter so that they were identical to those on his spacehog. He pulled back on the throttle until it would go no further and watched as stars, then galaxies, rushed past him….

The Star Cannibal was hungry. It was hungry. It felt hungry. It felt. It felt…purpose.

And then it felt something else – something it could not explain. Something we may call…déjà vu…..

Admiral Bunting finished his meal and returned to the bridge of the Svalbard. He had become accustomed to seeing his old friend Shaman Hood sitting motionless in the sumptuous chair beside his own. He looked across and saw that, as before, the Shaman’s eyes were dancing beneath their closed lids. Suddenly, the Shaman’s breathing became quicker and deeper. And then, without warning, he began to laugh……

Shaman Hood’s Starfighter streaked through galaxies, past nebulae, asteroids, spinning singularities, anomalous improbabilities, alongside Captain Calvert and droid Lockheed. Eventually they were back at a place he recognised; a place where he had last seen the Star Cannibals. A place where….Shaman Hood suddenly felt a strong sense of déjà vu………

S11:E7

HERE WE GO WITH THE LECO CHRONICLES SEASON 11 EPISODE 7! WHAT IS GOING ON?!😲

Captain Lou scowled. What to do with those gosh-darn Hombres? She could hear their singing even though the bridge and the hold were at opposite ends of her Starcruiser. And they were eating her out of house and home. She made a decision.

‘Bombardier!’ she called.

‘Aye aye, cap’n’ came the reply.

‘It’s time to clean out our hold. Will you go down there and push the flush button?’

‘But won’t that..?’

‘Just do it!’

‘But…’

‘That’s an order, sailor!’

The Bombardier turned on his heels and left. Down in the bowels of the Starcruiser he paused outside the door to the hold, his finger hovering over the button which, if pressed, would consign anything, or anyone, currently in the hold to the desolate space outside.

‘Hey, muchacho’ came a cry from inside the hold. ‘You wanna join us? We got tequila! And loco weed!’ All the Hombres began to laugh wildly.

The Bombardier pressed the button…….and the world flippeddeppilf…….

Back on the bridge, Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Captain Lou smiled. She was enjoying the company of the Hombres. They were good-natured and, although sometimes a little unruly, she had the feeling that they could be relied upon in a tight spot. And that was comforting…

With that the Transference Spot began to glow. The Hombres appeared, and in a state of some agitation. ‘Captain – your Bombardier…he appears to be outside the ship!’

Captain Lou smiled again. ‘Yes, he sometimes does that. He clears the ship of spacew……’

‘No – it’s not that!’ said Captain Jarnail. ‘He’s been flushed out of the hold……’

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……..

Shaman Hood of the Hawk was the first to see them. ‘Star Cannibals’ he cried. ‘Hemisphere one – bearing 77-19-19!’

All three Starfighters locked on to the co-ordinates and swung around to face the planet-sized boulder-beings which were consuming all in their path.

‘Flangectors on Phase-Delay-Overdrive! Play!’ Each of the three Starfighters released a deadly wave of flangector fire, coruscating Lydian arpeggios raking the Star Cannibals, which seemed to stop in their tracks and turn to face the Shaman and his cohorts. ‘Double time!’ he called. The fearsome sounds once again strafed the Star Cannibals. This time the huge entities began to tremble, sending subsonic waves towards the three tiny ships. ‘Hemidemisemiquaver wave!’ cried the Shaman. Nothing could withstand such an onslaught. The Star Cannibals were reduced to rubble in decahexabits.

Shaman Hood couldn’t help himself. He laughed out loud. And then he felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……

S11:E8

IT’S TIME FOR EPISODE 8 – WILL THE SPACE RENEGADES SAVE BOMBARDIER WALKER? READ ON!!!….

Captain Lou donned an Envirosuit and along with the Hombres, Dino of Jackson D’Ville and her remaining two crewmates, exited the Leco via the portalzone. She used her jetpack to manoeuvre herself, scanning the space for any sign of her Bombardier. A voice in her headset – the Astral Bard. ‘Over here!’

All seven of them turned and followed the Bard, who was propelling himself towards something apparently only he could see. As they neared whatever it was the Bard had seen, Captain Lou became aware of a vague shape, a phosphorescent nimbus, hovering in space, slowly rotating. As it turned it gained more form, but then turned again and became diaphanous once more. A little nearer and she could see that it was indeed the prostrate form of Bombardier Walker.

‘OK’ said the Astral Bard. Wait for him to turn this way again and when he is at his most corporeal, grab him. They watched in shocked silence as the Bombardier slowly rotated, almost fading to nothing, then becoming more solid until he looked virtually complete.

‘Now’ said the Astral Bard, and all seven took hold. Immediately the Bombardier became more ‘actual’. The Astral Bard whispered an incantation and the Bombardier slowly opened his eyes. Then he spoke.

‘Star Cannibals….’

Captain Calvert, Shaman Hood of the Hawk and Droid Lockheed sped through the clouds of rubble which were all that remained of the tribe of Star Cannibals which they had transfigured. They banked their Starfighters away from the edge of the universe and began the long voyage back to Atomhenge….

Captain Lou was troubled. The Bombardier was back on the Leco and she and her crew were standing around the medistation which held him.

‘Something very unusual was happening out there’ she said, mentally noting her talent for understatement. ‘Do we have any ideas?’

‘I do’ said the Astral Bard. ‘But I need to do some reading before I share them with you. I’ll be in the Room of Manuscripts if you need me.’ He turned and left….

Admiral Bunting sighed. The Svalbard’s Vistascreen was still blank, and Shaman Hood remained motionless. Thankfully, the Shaman hadn’t laughed again. That episode of hilarity had spooked the Admiral, and he didn’t care for a repeat performance. Then, the Shaman opened his eyes…..He spoke one word; ‘Psyder….’

The three Starfighters travelled back into the hangar underneath Atomhenge on a column of plasma like the one which had propelled them upwards….how long ago? Shaman Hood couldn’t be sure. The canopy opened and he vacated the cockpit. Captain Calvert and Droid Lockheed were already standing on the tarmac.

‘A successful mission!’ said the Captain.

‘Indeed so’ replied the Shaman.

‘So tell me’ continued the Captain. ‘We didn’t just go out there to terminate a tribe of Star Cannibals, did we?!’

‘No, we did not!’ admitted the wily Shaman. ‘We did much more’.

Care to share it with me? asked the Captain.

‘All in good time…..’

S11:E9

IT’S TIME FOR THE SEASON FINALE! WILL THE SPACE REBELS ALL SURVIVE TO LAUNCH THEIR SPACECHANTS INTO THE AETHER ON SATURDAY?!!! READ ON…….

Admiral Bunting passed the earthenware jug to Shaman Hood of the Hawk, who took it and drank a copious draught of its mysterious contents.

‘Aah, that’s better!’ exclaimed the newly-restored Shaman. ‘Have some yourself!’ The Admiral politely declined.

‘You had me worried for a while there’ said the Admiral. ‘Where exactly did you go?’

Shaman Hood smiled. ‘To the edge of time’ he replied……

The Astral Bard had returned to the bridge of the Leco from a lengthy sojourn in the Room of Manuscripts, deep in the bowels of the Starcruiser. His crewmates, Captain Lou and the Sonic Architect, looked to him with eager expectation. He smiled, mischief in his eyes.

‘I think I know what happened out there’ he said, modestly.

‘Come on then!’ said Captain Lou. ‘Don’t keep us in suspense……..’

Shaman Hood looked at the Svalbard’s Vistascreen. ‘We are in exactly the same place as we were before I Travelled?’ he asked.

‘We are’ replied the Admiral. I dropped the anchor as soon as you went into your…trance.’
‘Good’ replied the Shaman. ‘Then we just have to wait……’

‘….Remember when we first saw The Sombrero in the Vistascreen?’ asked the Astral Bard.

‘Yes’ said Captain Lou and the Sonic Architect simultaneously.

‘At that point we were at the farthest known reach of space-time. I believe we intersected with a parallel universe…….!

Captain Calvert and Shaman Hood of the Hawk were sitting in the Officer’s Mess in Atomhenge. Droid Lockheed stood to attention behind them.

‘So come on’ said the Captain. ‘It’s time you levelled with me!’ The Shaman smiled.

‘I was on board the Svalbard with Admiral Bunting. We were enjoying a little interstellar relaxation. We were in convoy with the Leco and the Italian Vogue.’

Captain Calvert raised an eyebrow. ‘Reprobates, one and all!’ he said.

‘Indeed’ replied the Shaman. ‘Another ship joined us – the Sombrero. And then, all three disappeared. I recognised the place we were in – right at the edge of curved space.’

‘The edge of time!’ said the Captain.

‘Quite so’ replied the Shaman. ‘The edge of time; and I recalled that the last time I’d been there, something curious had happened. I was pursuing a tribe of Star Cannibals when they disappeared. Just like that. I remembered a quote from the Scriptures. It said “Everything exists for itself, yet everything is part of something else. The One and the many contain in themselves the principles of time and space. The way up and the way down are one and the same” I’d never quite understood what it meant, but now I do.’

The Captain smiled. ‘Parallel universes’ he said.

‘Yes, quite so’ replied the Shaman. ‘I figured that the three ships had flipped from one universe to another. The way up and the way down are one and the same. They existed simultaneously in two places, at least.’

‘And when we encountered the Star Cannibals, they were also straddling the parallel universes?’ asked the Captain.

‘Certainly’ replied the Shaman. ‘In fact, I believe they were a gateway. Everything is part of something else.’

‘Not anymore!’ said the Captain. They both laughed long and loud….

…. ‘And the Bombardier’ continued the Astral Bard, ‘was straddling the parallel universes.’

It was almost too much to take in…..
Admiral Bunting and Shaman Hood of the Hawk watched the Vistascreen. ‘Almost time’ said the Shaman. With that, the screen shimmered and the three Starcruisers reappeared. The screen crackled. A voice spoke….

‘….is the Sombrero. And we are Hombre!’

‘Good to meet you, Hombre!’ said Captain Lou, who had suddenly felt a strong sense of déjà vu…. ‘Something tells me we shouldn’t stick around here for too long! Bombardier, set course for Terra Gaia. We’re going home…….’

S11:E10

And so it came to pass that Andy, Son of Richard and Admiral Bunting did hold a Festival of Spacechants at the Temple of O’Rileys in Kardomah City. The Leconauts, Hombre and Dino of Jackson D’Ville, with his trusty Thunder Conjurer, Zachary of The Odorou, did launch their spacechants into the aether. Much spacejuice was consumed, and Shaman Hood of the Hawk did drain his fabled earthenware jug of the Psyder which it contained. 

After the festivities, The Leconauts, Captain Jarnail, his Hombres, Dino of Jackson D’Ville and Zachary of The Odorou were relaxing with Andy, Son of Richard, Shaman Hood and Admiral Bunting.

‘One thing is bothering me’ said the Sonic Architect. ‘These parallel universes; are they just duplicates of this universe, because if that were the case, there would seem to be no point to their existence?’

‘Of course I can’t say for certain’, said the Astral Bard, ‘but I would conjecture that if two parallel universes were to come into contact with each other, then they would be opposites of each other, like dark and light, high and low, good and bad……..’

They all sat in silence, pondering this knotty conundrum.

Captain Lou felt a sudden strong sense of déjà vu……….

 

TO BE CONTINUED….(there’s always more from our Keeper of the Sacred Flangector, Sonic Architect Parsons – watch this space!)

To be continued…

By Loudhailer Electric Company’s Sonic Architect and keeper of the sacred flangector, Jeff Parsons

 

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